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♣ The name's Zanny... which means adventurous, crazy... ♣ Still considering what permanent job I want for the rest of my life. ♣ Loves: Wolves, dogs, MY cello, looking at clouds, My family and... you know who you are. ♣ Hates: Backstabbers? people who talk without using their brains first? you get the point. ♣ Dreams of: Having a 9-5 job that pays well. Have my own house where i can provide a living heaven for my dogs. Live a peaceful life with those i hold dear to. Have a family. Die peacefully. ♣ I'm just an ordinary girl, living in a extraordinary world. Longing for time to myself where i can just sit down with my dogs by my side, sipping tea and looking at the clouds drift by. ♣ I hate pain and am really sensitive to pain. Hates people randomly slapping me, I don't care whether it's a light pat or a tight slap. ♣ I'm very anti social and hates the effort of reconnecting with people. It doesn't mean I don't care or I've forgotten them though... Just call me and i WILL be there for you. ♣ It's just that, It hurts to know that there's a distance and we won't be as close as we used to. Sigh, I really wish college could last forever. I had my closest high school friends as my housemates and i found the best friends i could only dream of. And i found you. ♣ I think too much. I wake up from my dreams crying sometimes. Sometimes because of a friend. Might be my family or even you. I cry and get depressed when I'm drunk. I'm just weird. sorry. ♣♣ Like an instrument for a song - Like the sun for tomorrow's dawn - Every moment of time's just an answer to find - What you're here for, what you breathe for - What you wake for, What you bleed for. Tagboard
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Sunday, January 16, 2011
, 5:44:00 AM
⇨What the heck... This is the suckiest weekend ever... All i wanted was a drama-less, peaceful, no heartache, no intrusions... Just a simple relationship... where i can just be happy and carefree... and yet... i get this. This complicated, full-of-hatred black hole. and now... im a slut... Feels kinda weird. I have personally never been called the S word in my face. And worst of all, i actually feel guilty. Am i really? i ask myself at least once a day... It really hit me real hard... like one tight slap across my face. It stings. And every time i see him i feel that pang right at my chest... I have a feeling that i'm obliged to stay as far away from him as possible... haha... guess we'll never happen then. Her existence sickens me. Yet it is an existence that i cannot ignore. But i can't do anything. i have no say in this situation. I'm tired sick. Numb right to the heart. I can't even cry my pain out. Relationships suck. |