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♣ The name's Zanny... which means adventurous, crazy... ♣ Still considering what permanent job I want for the rest of my life. ♣ Loves: Wolves, dogs, MY cello, looking at clouds, My family and... you know who you are. ♣ Hates: Backstabbers? people who talk without using their brains first? you get the point. ♣ Dreams of: Having a 9-5 job that pays well. Have my own house where i can provide a living heaven for my dogs. Live a peaceful life with those i hold dear to. Have a family. Die peacefully. ♣ I'm just an ordinary girl, living in a extraordinary world. Longing for time to myself where i can just sit down with my dogs by my side, sipping tea and looking at the clouds drift by. ♣ I hate pain and am really sensitive to pain. Hates people randomly slapping me, I don't care whether it's a light pat or a tight slap. ♣ I'm very anti social and hates the effort of reconnecting with people. It doesn't mean I don't care or I've forgotten them though... Just call me and i WILL be there for you. ♣ It's just that, It hurts to know that there's a distance and we won't be as close as we used to. Sigh, I really wish college could last forever. I had my closest high school friends as my housemates and i found the best friends i could only dream of. And i found you. ♣ I think too much. I wake up from my dreams crying sometimes. Sometimes because of a friend. Might be my family or even you. I cry and get depressed when I'm drunk. I'm just weird. sorry. ♣♣ Like an instrument for a song - Like the sun for tomorrow's dawn - Every moment of time's just an answer to find - What you're here for, what you breathe for - What you wake for, What you bleed for. Tagboard
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![]() ![]() Music Playlist at MixPod.com |
Friday, March 19, 2010
, 9:11:00 AM
⇨ Shit! I've never felt so helpless before... I was SO close! So close to forgetting that bloody feeling... So close to getting him out of my bloody mind... So close to letting every bloody thing go... Then ... suddenly out of the blues... All the things I've been trying for days and weeks to let go keep flooding back again... This is bad... Feel like I'm going crazy right now... I just feel like sitting in a corner and stoning off... Which is infact impossible... Played my cello for the first time since last year... I really almost forgot how music makes me feel... haha~ But I know I'll never forget the feel of my cello... not to mention the smell...XD The minute I smelled the smell of my cello... I felt like I've gone back home...^^ only now I realy realize... I NEED music in my life... because for that one hour... I could completely just lose myself into the tune of my cello... I forgot everything... just concentrating on my cello alone... It felt like time had stopped there and then... and I never wanted time to continue ever again... ... That's how I feel when I play... That's why I'll make an effort to try and continue making music a part of my life... ^^ that's my promise to myself anyway~~ |